WHEN people ask me why I am single, I tell them it's mainly because I cry before, during and after sex and use a bit too much teeth. Not every time, but regularly enough for it to become a bit of an issue for my partner. I like to call it a mild quirk. You … Continue reading Why Has A Producer From ‘The Bachelor’ Been Promising Me A Date For 19 Months?
SITTING in a hostel and all anyone can talk about is Burning Man. Honestly, I've overheard countless conversations and the only thing anyone can really report back is how dusty it is and how dirty their clothes still are. That is really annoying to me. Here are some other things that I kind of hate … Continue reading Things I Hate About Travel That Other People Probably Can’t Relate To
SOME people call me a man whisperer. I don't know why. I'm much more of a man yeller. But nevertheless, they keep coming to me for advice. The people ask the questions, I give the answers. You're welcome guys. The following are some texts which I've been asked to analyse over the past few months. … Continue reading Love and Relationship Advice From Someone Who Has Dated At Least 10 People
THERE are just some things you shouldn't do. People who sit in those massage chairs in shopping centres and actually use them. WHY do you do that? As if shopping centres aren’t distressing enough without seeing your pulsating body and smug imbecilic face. Don't make my experience worse than it has to be. Waiters and … Continue reading Things I Don’t Understand About Life & Love
I REMEMBER the day it all came out because it was my twenty-seventh birthday. On that day, the universe said to me, “Hey Alex, guess what?” I said “Hey, what?" It simply smiled and looked down at me. I smiled and looked up. We both smiled back at each other. Then the universe said: WIPE THAT … Continue reading I Got Two Timed For Too Long And Here’s What I Learned
IF this offends you good. You deserve it. Competitions: I’m going to say this once and once only. Do not share anything that says “share to win”. You will not win. Not only will you not win, you will LOSE AT LIFE YOU FUCKING MORONIC LOSER. Is there some kind of vaccination against stupidity? We need … Continue reading 10 Ways You’re Being A…
EVER wanted to know if you're a hypocrite? The answer is YES, you are. Everybody is and that's why the world is FUCKED.
I'VE long held the opinion that no matter how inappropriately a woman behaves, there will still always be men who are more than willing to have sex with her. In fact, I’d almost go as far as to say the more weird and 'crazy' a girl is, the more likely she is to have a … Continue reading Proof Men Love Crazy Women
SO the results are in and yet again, I agree with myself. These lists aren’t indicative of what is deemed to be attractive, rather they're a guide as to what one might want or look for in a long-term partner in theory. But as we know life isn't a theory and we're all going to end … Continue reading Top 10 Most & Least Desirable Male Professions As Voted By Me
Some of these things annoy me. Other things I've learnt annoy other people. Most of these things I do on purpose to be intentionally annoying. It keeps me entertained. I'm not proud of this, but at least I'm honest. When there’s a bunch of people already waiting at the pedestrian crossing, walk up and … Continue reading 39 Ways To Infuriate People In Life & Love
It's like fundamentalism without 'da mental' part 